The Secret Confessions of a Horny House Wife

You can’t tell the horny players without a program… 

The Horny Housewife- I’m an unhappily married mommy.  I’ve been having affairs since November, 2007

Detective Curt – Handsome police detective.  My first affair.

Valentine Dave – Sweet, funny, smart talented writer.  My second affair.

Sergeant Shane – Hunky blue-eyed police sergeant.  Huge penis.  My third affair.

Quirky Ted – Sweet, smart, funny, tall, interesting.  My fourth affair.  He went back to his wife.  If the sex had been better, I would have been absolutely destroyed.  As it was, it hurt a lot.

Mike - My fifth affair.  Just call me the whorey Housewife.  Perfect for me right now: handsome, but not tall; big penis, but not huge; I like him, but I don’t love him.  In many ways, the best sex I’ve had through all this.  He calls me his sex slave and spanks and slaps me.  I love that. 

Morty - A reader of this blog.  I crossed the line and now have a cyber/telephone relationship with him.  Smart and sexy, he writes the dirtiest, hottest e-mails I have ever encountered. 

Spencer – My son, my treasure.

Husband – On a good day, he’s Denis Leary.  On a bad day, he’s WC Fields.  We have sex very rarely, about once every six months, although we once went a year and a half without sex.  I kid you not…