The Secret Confessions of a Horny House Wife

What is the difference between feeling love and being in love?  What is the difference between feeling loved and being loved? 

I remind myself that just because I feel love for Donny, that doesn’t mean I should spend my whole life with him.  As I’ve written before, I am an extremest.  My mind tends to wander towards the most extreme outcome for any situation, and then my wits work to plot a strategy for getting to that most extreme point.  I have to stop that.  

Things are most passionate, loving, and satisfying between Donny and me when we are laying in bed together.  Outside of that, things are nice, but not fabulous. 

There is another man.  Let’s call him Bill.  I think about going to meet him sometimes.  I think someday I will, but not while I am still seeing Donny.  That’s not the person I want to be anymore. 

So for now, I’ll wait and see and enjoy everything I have.  (I have so much.)  I worry about how I will know when the time to end things with Donny will be.  I worry I won’t be able to let go of everything that’s good with him, although my instincts tell me I should, that he is wonderful, but that we are not right for each other.   I love lying in his arms.  I love fucking him.  I love how he holds me and kisses me.  I’m not sure how he feels about me.  Do I really want to know, or am I just looking for a notch to fill my ever-hungry heart? 

I don’t know.  But when I talk to myself, here is what I say: “focus on the flow, horny housewife, focus on the flow.”